morning sickness

dawn: I was feeling so numb. I felt that I might die. Left half of my body can't feel anything. It was as if I will die. I felt all my saliva grown like acid. I can feel each swallow and making its way down my stomach.

I felt like I'm gonna faint. Vomit. Lifeless.

I slept on it as I was afraid to stumble my way down the stairs to the bathroom. I fight the urge to run down the house to vomit and just collapse.

I slept, I woke up. Drink milk. Take my medicines and eventually I puke nothing.

I miss Ryan

a lot

I'm crying most of the time.

I'm trying to be so brave.

but at the end of the day

I still long for him

I hope not to wait much